Guest Contributor: Peter L.

Note from the Editor: Thank you for sharing your truth, Peter! Although this is a space reserved for women, I believed your story would resonate with the masses.

I can still remember a time when I thought that my life would always be controlled by substances. I used to sit on the beach in Maui and watch the ocean as I drank an entire bottle of rum. I was trying to gather the courage to walk out into the water and never come back. So often, I wished my life was over. If I only could have seen where I’d be in just five years.

Now, I live in a gorgeous home in the suburbs of Atlanta with my wonderful wife. I work full time as an outreach coordinator and freelance writer, doing a lot of work in the recovery field. I’ve been clean for over a year, and I dedicate my life to helping others who are in the same situation that I used to be in.

When I left Maui, I returned to my home town of Philadelphia. I was still homeless–as I had been for the majority of the previous ten years–and now I was addicted to heroin. In winter 2014, I was hit by a car as I walked across the street. I ended up getting a double hip replacement and a femur replacement. It was then, I fell to my darkest place. I couldn’t see any way out, and I began to have thoughts of suicide again. 

In a moment of desperation, I called my mother who was living in Atlanta. She told me I could come down here to stay with her and her husband. When I got to Atlanta, I started attending a Unity church. I met some incredible new friends, and I also met my amazing future wife. We started dating, and I was head over heels. She believed in me so much that I began to believe in myself and grow stronger. 

The journey from homeless alcoholic and drug addict to the person I am now definitely wasn’t easy, and there were times when I stumbled, relapsed, and struggled. Sometimes, I still struggle with mental health issues as well as everyday stresses. But now I know how to endure without turning to substances. 

I can see why all of the hard times were necessary when I look back now. I would have never learned what I needed to learn or be where I needed to be if I hadn’t been homeless or addicted to drugs. If I hadn’t gotten hit by the car, I never would have met my wife. If I hadn’t been so close to suicide so many times, I wouldn’t have the appreciation for life I have today.

It’s now my main goal in life to find others who are in dark places–the homeless, those who are struggling with addiction or mental health, those who are grieving over loss, those who feel completely hopeless–and show them that it will get better.

I’m living proof. 

You may need to get help in order for it to get better. You may need to see a counselor or a psychiatrist. You may need to seek professional alcohol or drug addiction treatment. You may need to find support groups. It won’t be easy, but you will get through it. 

So, if that’s you, don’t give up on life. It can and will get better for you if you find something to believe in. And you, too, will be able to transform your obstacles into opportunities.